Computer Humor

Q. What happens to programmers when they die?
A: They get deallocated? Their values become undefined? They get re-intialized? Their structures break down? They become WORM food? They start dropping bits. They branch to a new address!

Have you heard about the new Cray? It's so fast, it executes an infinite loop in 6 seconds.

My sister Cecilia opened a computer store in Hawaii. She sells C shells by the seashore.

Earth is 98% full ... please delete anyone you can.

To define recursion, we must first define recursion.

Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.

If a train station is where the train stops, what is a work station?

God is Real, unless explicitly declared Integer...

Fifty Ways to Hose Your Code (sung to the tune of 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover)

The problem's all inside your code she said to me;

Recursion is easy if you take it logically.

I'm here to help you if you're struggling to learn C,

There must be fifty ways to hose your code.

She said it's really not my habit to #include,

And I hope my files won't be lost or misconstrued;

But I'll recompile at the risk of getting screwed,

There must be fifty ways to hose your code.

Just blow up the stack Jack,

Make a bad call Paul,

Just hit the wrong key Lee,

And set your pointers free.

Just mess up the bus Gus,

You don't need to recurse much,

You just listen to me.

She said it greives me to see you compile again.

I wish there were some hardware that wasn't such a pain.

I said I appreciate that and could you please explain,

About the fifty ways.

She said why don't we both just work on it tonight,

And I'm sure in the morning it'll be working just right.

Then she hosed me and I realized she probably was right,

There must be fifty ways to hose your code.

Just lose the address Les,

Clear the wrong int Clint,

Traverse the wrong tree Lee,

And set your list free.

Just mess up the bus Gus,

You don't need to recurse much,

You just program in C.

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